One
month ago today, I answered the phone to life-altering news. While the biggest changes are yet to come,
there have been noticeable changes around here already, and I would say that
all of them have been for the better. Life is moving at a faster pace now as we
try to accomplish – well – everything before
our little man arrives, and still there is so much more to do.
I
battled with a photo site for weeks and finally came up with a photo album I
was happy to send to Francis. Last week
we sent that off to him along with a care package filled with love. We know the package made it to the
Philippines early this week, so now we’re anxiously awaiting the news that the
package got to Francis. At the same
time, we’re still waiting for his legals to arrive, and hope that those show up
soon.
I
was asked several times if the wait is harder for me now that I have Francis’ pictures
in hand and know who he is and where he is. Maybe after a few months it will be, but
right now the answer is an honest “No.”
Don’t get me wrong. I have his
pictures everywhere – I carry them with me and show them off to anyone who asks (and some who don’t.) I have his pictures in a screensaver on my
computer, and there are some nights that I just sit and watch it play over and
over and over. I just want to hold him
and give him hugs and kisses, and I can’t believe I was blessed enough to be
chosen for this child. But right now, I know that he has
caregivers who love him and are taking wonderful care of him. He has a best friend. I know how hard it is going to be for him to
separate from his caregivers and his friends.
I know how hard it will be for them to say goodbye to him. The nearly 37 months that I waited for the
biggest phone call of my life was an incredibly long time, and four to five
months pales in comparison. One month is
already gone, and it went by quickly. If
Francis was in a horrible place it would be a different story, but I know he is
healthy and happy and that’s what’s important right now. Do I want him with me and would I get him in
five minutes if that’s what I could do?
Yes. In the meantime, he is well
taken care of and happy, and that’s the most a mother can ask for until she has
her child in her arms.
