One month ago today, I answered the phone to life-altering news. While the biggest changes are yet to come, there have been noticeable changes around here already, and I would say that all of them have been for the better. Life is moving at a faster pace now as we try to accomplish – well – everything before our little man arrives, and still there is so much more to do.
I battled with a photo site for weeks and finally came up with a photo album I was happy to send to Francis. Last week we sent that off to him along with a care package filled with love. We know the package made it to the Philippines early this week, so now we’re anxiously awaiting the news that the package got to Francis. At the same time, we’re still waiting for his legals to arrive, and hope that those show up soon.
I was asked several times if the wait is harder for me now that I have Francis’ pictures in hand and know who he is and where he is. Maybe after a few months it will be, but right now the answer is an honest “No.” Don’t get me wrong. I have his pictures everywhere – I carry them with me and show them off to anyone who asks (and some who don’t.) I have his pictures in a screensaver on my computer, and there are some nights that I just sit and watch it play over and over and over. I just want to hold him and give him hugs and kisses, and I can’t believe I was blessed enough to be chosen for this child. But right now, I know that he has caregivers who love him and are taking wonderful care of him. He has a best friend. I know how hard it is going to be for him to separate from his caregivers and his friends. I know how hard it will be for them to say goodbye to him. The nearly 37 months that I waited for the biggest phone call of my life was an incredibly long time, and four to five months pales in comparison. One month is already gone, and it went by quickly. If Francis was in a horrible place it would be a different story, but I know he is healthy and happy and that’s what’s important right now. Do I want him with me and would I get him in five minutes if that’s what I could do? Yes. In the meantime, he is well taken care of and happy, and that’s the most a mother can ask for until she has her child in her arms.