One
month ago today, I answered the phone to life-altering news. While the biggest changes are yet to come,
there have been noticeable changes around here already, and I would say that
all of them have been for the better. Life is moving at a faster pace now as we
try to accomplish – well – everything before
our little man arrives, and still there is so much more to do.
I
battled with a photo site for weeks and finally came up with a photo album I
was happy to send to Francis. Last week
we sent that off to him along with a care package filled with love. We know the package made it to the
Philippines early this week, so now we’re anxiously awaiting the news that the
package got to Francis. At the same
time, we’re still waiting for his legals to arrive, and hope that those show up
soon.
I
was asked several times if the wait is harder for me now that I have Francis’ pictures
in hand and know who he is and where he is. Maybe after a few months it will be, but
right now the answer is an honest “No.”
Don’t get me wrong. I have his
pictures everywhere – I carry them with me and show them off to anyone who asks (and some who don’t.) I have his pictures in a screensaver on my
computer, and there are some nights that I just sit and watch it play over and
over and over. I just want to hold him
and give him hugs and kisses, and I can’t believe I was blessed enough to be
chosen for this child. But right now, I know that he has
caregivers who love him and are taking wonderful care of him. He has a best friend. I know how hard it is going to be for him to
separate from his caregivers and his friends.
I know how hard it will be for them to say goodbye to him. The nearly 37 months that I waited for the
biggest phone call of my life was an incredibly long time, and four to five
months pales in comparison. One month is
already gone, and it went by quickly. If
Francis was in a horrible place it would be a different story, but I know he is
healthy and happy and that’s what’s important right now. Do I want him with me and would I get him in
five minutes if that’s what I could do?
Yes. In the meantime, he is well
taken care of and happy, and that’s the most a mother can ask for until she has
her child in her arms.
God is Good!
ReplyDeleteHis plan is in motion and soon another family under his care will be together - forever.
Love, hugs and kisses to Francis, and his mom and dad.
Lola and Lolo
P.S. The brag book has traveled MANY MILES already:)
I am sure that Francis is going to love his care package and will especially love the book that you made for him. He is already loved so much by so many people. What a blessed little boy and what blessed parents he has!!! Let me tell you, this part of the wait will go more quickly. I found that it passed so quickly that I didn't even get a chance to do everything that I had to do before Rafael came home. In other ways, this part of the wait is endless. Praying that time goes quickly and that Francis is soon in your arms. Forever!!!!
ReplyDeleteYour understanding of this part of wait amazes me - I am sure half you wants to tear straight over there and the other half knows its not too much longer to wait. :hug: I still hope you get to travel sooner rather than later!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you about the wait. I waited years just wondering if it would ever really happen. Would we really adopt? My 10 year old son even ask if we really were going to adopt. I had to answer honestly that I just didn't know. To know that this is the child that we prayed for and long for and that she is ours was amazing. I knew I could make it for a few more months. I had so much to do once we knew who we were planning for and what the situation was like for our child and what her needs were. I will tell you the last step was waiting for travel approval which took 2 weeks. That was a killer. I had everything ready and there was nothing else to do and I wanted to buy plane tickets. So, so happy to be able to follow your journey. Advice for you: Don't focus on that first meeting(easier said than done I know.) Everything happens in a whirl wind and it may not be the best encounter.(although we are dealing with different countries) Focus on life afterwards. Be prepared for how he may respond with being in your care. But also know that the issues you have may not be what you prepared for. LOL! I was prepared for many things that did happen and I wasn't alarmed. It was exhausting dealing with all the meltdowns. I knew that we were making good progress in the grieving, but there were many issues that just never were a problem when we got home. The one issue that as we were leaving for China came into my mind. "What if she has issues with food?" Oh please not that one I thought. I didn't have time to think about that one. What one did she deal with? Yup! Issues with food!
ReplyDeleteHugs and prayers!
I'm going to get in trouble for saying this, perhaps, but you have a much healthier and positive attitude than many about the travel wait. And you have waited far longer than many as well. Keep up those positive thoughts. The ensuing months won't be easy, but you are awesome Jen, and Francis is going to have a great life with his new mama and daddy. The fact that you recognize the importance of the people in his life now and that he isn't "floundering" in some orphanage waiting for you to "rescue" him is both heartwarming, broadminded, and mature! You are so ready to parent this wonderful little boy!
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